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Other Topics => Creative Endeavors => Topic started by: Jophess on June 04, 2008, 05:20:56 pm

Title: This Is Not Love
Post by: Jophess on June 04, 2008, 05:20:56 pm

So I wrote this poem today and I was curious as to what you guys thought. I don't really write poetry (I write songs, but that's quite different), but this one sort of flowed from my fingers.

This is not love, I know that much;
For it does seem to manifest
An innate need for human touch
And self-perception not it’s best.

I saw thee amble up the stair,
Direct attraction I did feel -
Thy golden legs and golder hair
The center of thy pure appeal.

But seeing thee disparate is
From knowing thee, or touching thee;
This self-imposed forbiddingness
Will take its toll, increasingly.

This is not love, for love is kind
And cozy in its soft repose;
These notions filling up my mind
Reflect not love, but all my woes.

Title: This Is Not Love
Post by: iluvvanessa on June 04, 2008, 05:25:07 pm

I like it, nice job.

Title: This Is Not Love
Post by: SadAsBlue on June 04, 2008, 05:55:05 pm

Well done, you have a true talent with words

Title: This Is Not Love
Post by: IfICouldFall on June 05, 2008, 11:21:03 am

wooh! I like it, almost Shakesperean with the iambic beats. good job!  :D

Title: This Is Not Love
Post by: Jophess on June 05, 2008, 02:46:16 pm

Quote from: "IfICouldFall"

wooh! I like it, almost Shakesperean with the iambic beats. good job!  :D

Thanks for noticing the iambic beats. That was the hardest part of writing it. I try to stick faithfully to iambic pentameter/quatrameter/etc. when I write.

Title: This Is Not Love
Post by: IfICouldFall on June 09, 2008, 03:05:22 pm

^^^ That's awesome, since that songs nowadays aren't really that "artistic" anymore and it's great to bring back the form in which all of the writing today basically started!  :D

Title: Re: This Is Not Love
Post by: SylvanHistorian30 on June 30, 2009, 09:34:05 am

Wow, finely written! I almost thought it was a Shakespeare poem.
Good work!

Title: Re: This Is Not Love
Post by: joey on July 01, 2009, 10:13:33 pm

nice work... I like the concept. Very epiphany like...