NESSAholics.com
Other Topics => Creative Endeavors => Topic started by: Jophess on June 04, 2008, 05:20:56 pm
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So I wrote this poem today and I was curious as to what you guys thought. I don't really write poetry (I write songs, but that's quite different), but this one sort of flowed from my fingers.
This is not love, I know that much;
For it does seem to manifest
An innate need for human touch
And self-perception not it’s best.
I saw thee amble up the stair,
Direct attraction I did feel -
Thy golden legs and golder hair
The center of thy pure appeal.
But seeing thee disparate is
From knowing thee, or touching thee;
This self-imposed forbiddingness
Will take its toll, increasingly.
This is not love, for love is kind
And cozy in its soft repose;
These notions filling up my mind
Reflect not love, but all my woes.
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I like it, nice job.
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Well done, you have a true talent with words
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wooh! I like it, almost Shakesperean with the iambic beats. good job! :D
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wooh! I like it, almost Shakesperean with the iambic beats. good job! :D
Thanks for noticing the iambic beats. That was the hardest part of writing it. I try to stick faithfully to iambic pentameter/quatrameter/etc. when I write.
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^^^ That's awesome, since that songs nowadays aren't really that "artistic" anymore and it's great to bring back the form in which all of the writing today basically started! :D
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Wow, finely written! I almost thought it was a Shakespeare poem.
Good work!
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nice work... I like the concept. Very epiphany like...