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Other Topics => Creative Endeavors => Topic started by: Ryou-Neko on July 03, 2006, 07:28:26 am

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: Ryou-Neko on July 03, 2006, 07:28:26 am

Here's some more of my writing from the second book. I finished it two days ago. That made me happy. Anyway:

This one is very out-of-style for me, I usually don't write like this. I wanted to sound like Conor Oberst, I guess. It's called "Willing to Die Happy"

Willing to Die Happy
This is the last year until sorrow
Hits the window like water
And it floods over everything
And anything it can swallow
It’s a mask you have made
But there is no air hole
And you thought you melted the ice
But now you’re choking on snow
And it melts in your mouth
But is it any good? Because
It’s already found the reason it could
Become solid again,
Unlike your relationship,
You twist and you bend,
And you will never condemn
All the things that you did
To the past where they belong
Not reality, but a memory
And it writes, writes so long
Not an essay, but a story
That goes on and on
And you can’t find the ending
Cause the story is of your life
And it makes it worth living
Just to make the mistakes
That you’ve already made
Over and over again
Just to make it all real
You find you haven’t healed
You are still confined to the bed
Where you have lain for years
And you think you’re diseased
That you cannot get up
But you can do anything
If you want it enough
So you get out of that bed
You push the sheets to the side
And you stand and you walk
Your eyes swelling with pride
And you cry, and you cry
Because this is all real
And you have made this work out
Now you consider yourself real
Cause you are worth something
To someone other than me
Cause you are worth something
To everybody
And you love, and you love
Because this is what happens
When you want something so much
That you are willing to die
But die happy


Here's another...It's called "Leave it Behind" and to me it's sort of "New Resolution" by Azure Ray - esque. That was a mouthful. Here it is:

Leave it Behind
You write and you write
Now the plot is thickening
It grows and it grows
And you can’t help listening
To the song that it sings
That you love to hear played
The loveliness that you thought of
Is fading

Can’t you see all of the things
That you can’t leave behind
Can’t you see all of the things
That you can’t leave behind

You live and you love
And you make your friendships
They grow and they grow
And they might get you through this
Pain that you feel
That is making its mark
On your body and your soul
It’s fading

Can’t you see all of the things
That you can’t leave behind
Can’t you see all of the things
That you can’t leave behind

You are falling
You can’t get up
I reach down to help you
You refused my hand

Can’t you see all of the things
That you can’t leave behind
Can’t you see all of the things
That you can’t leave behind

You write and you write
And you near the ending
You sing and you sing
And you stop breathing but you
Go on and on
And finish your task
You go on and on and on


That's it for now. I'll be sure to mention the Nessaholics forum in the dedication page =D

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: MeganJane on July 07, 2006, 04:39:00 am

I like your use of imagery. I'm surprised more people haven't commented... maybe it's just because these poems are long....very long. I think you have to be in the right mood or it could get a bit tedious. I'm not criticizing you though, you've done a good job. It's sweet that you're going to mention us Nessaholics :)

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: whitehouses81680 on July 07, 2006, 07:43:45 am

i have been reading this progressivly
i am taking it all in

very nice, u should publish it or enter it into a contest..u never know

i wrote a personal narrative about my vacation to san fransisco and talked about ALCATRAZ and it won 2nd place in the young authors confrence in the section of PERSONAL NARRATIVE

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: Ryou-Neko on July 07, 2006, 08:31:44 am

Thanks for the compliments!  :D These are actually really long for me. Normally they don't go over two or three stanzas. I'm planning to publish them, these two are from my second book, which I finished (finally) the other day. I have two manuscripts ready and I'm looking for an agent. Thanks again! :D

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: MeganJane on July 07, 2006, 09:50:48 pm

You're welcome. And Samantha, congrats!

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: Ryou-Neko on July 07, 2006, 10:25:25 pm

Yes! Congrats to Samantha to stuff. I'm not on drugs, BTW.

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: whitehouses81680 on July 09, 2006, 12:17:59 pm

thankyou

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: Ryou-Neko on July 10, 2006, 07:36:35 am

I'm assuming you meant Alcatraz the (former) prison. That seems interesting. Do you have a copy of it? You should post it.

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: whitehouses81680 on July 11, 2006, 11:28:41 am

no ethan, i really went to Alcatraz as a prisoner (i like to call it a "vacation")
 :roll:

its pretty long...i'll try to find  it and post excerpts

Title: And More of Them:
Post by: Ryou-Neko on July 12, 2006, 10:22:32 am

lol. Okay, I'll be looking for that.