Some lyrics I started...

[me and my piano---tim]

He so I was wondering if this is any good... no title yet. The first segment is a rap. The second verse starts the singing...

This.Hurts.So.Much
I can't control myself
I need to scream
I want to yell
And if I fall before I fly,
So be it, cuz I'd rather die
Than live a life I've never learned
I need to sting
I want to burn
But I'm sick of all this street-smart shit
I need a text book right here quick
So from the top now,
Chapter One,
I'll see if I can't learn my love

Maybe the answer's in the pages
Passed down to me through all the ages
I need to skip to Chapter Twenty-two
It's time that I learn something new and

All I want's the love, I'll learn
And all I need's a light to burn
And I'm free --
To turn it off
And I'm free to turn it back on

So I'll close this book I've opened and
Chalk it up to my emotions and
Play the part of me that only reason sees
Now show myself some decency

All I want's the love, I'll learn
And all I need's a light to burn
And I'm free --
To turn it off
And I'm free to turn it back on

[VanessaCarltonMania]

OMG! this is awesome!!!    

[Morgan]

Yeah, that's really good!!!

[me and my piano---tim]

wow thanks guys, I wasn't sure if it was just me who liked it. I guess I'll have to finish it now.

[VanessaCarltonMania]

wow thanks guys, I wasn't sure if it was just me who liked it. I guess I'll have to finish it now.

yep! u HAVE to! LOL  :lol:  :lol:
Can't wait to see the rest of it

[ImLearning]

Far to juvenile for my taiste, but its clear you have some talent
Your lyrics that are supposedly sung are much better than the rap, it dosent really flow and the rhyms in it are weak.

Like, your wording is very good and catchy.... it reminds me a lot of a more juvenlie James Blunt.

The major problem I had after reading it is that nothing came to my mind... no picture was formed... it was if i was reading aimlessly with nothing happening

[me and my piano---tim]

Far to juvenile for my taiste, but its clear you have some talent
Your lyrics that are supposedly sung are much better than the rap, it dosent really flow and the rhyms in it are weak.

Like, your wording is very good and catchy.... it reminds me a lot of a more juvenlie James Blunt.

The major problem I had after reading it is that nothing came to my mind... no picture was formed... it was if i was reading aimlessly with nothing happening

Hey thanks for the comment... Not sure I agree with the word "juvenile" but I think I get what you mean. And thanks for the James Blunt comaprison... interesting you would say that. I especially agree there is a sort of aimlessness to the song. Maybe I should add more of a setting, more images. I want the listener to feel like they're in my head when they hear the song, though... It's not clear to me how to best convey that emotion.