What a great essay! I love how you work in all the quotes and the one from Stevie is just priceless and so true! (though you should probably site that as a quote). I like the content of the third paragraph a lot I think you should add to it! I also like the progression and sequence you have the paragraphs in, it keeps the essay moving forward.
some constructive criticism?
Some details could be explained a little more. I think someone reading this who does not know Vanessa's history might be a little confused. The first area is the in the intro. You write about how she was a piano prodigy but then she moves to NYC for ballet? There should be a little tid bit about her also loving dance in there. In the first paragraph there really isn't an explanation of her approach from first album to last album (I don't know if you wanted that in there or not, but it might work if you did add it since you do reference "her roots"). If I were editing this essay I would also make some minor changes with punctuation and sentence structure/variation.
Overall I think the bones are great!
I hope I don't offed with my constructive cirticism!
Did you already submit the essay?