Okay, don't take this seriously. I started this in an e-mail with Andrea, and decided to build on it. I hope this makes you all laugh and all that fun stuff. I think it is very funny.
(The five Spice Girls, Ginger Spice, Baby Spice, Sporty Spice, Posh Spice, and Scary Spice are sitting around the table thinking up their names)
Emma : Oh, I have a jolly good idea, I do!
Black Weird Scary Girl : Oh, shut up, you beastly little 3rd grader!
Emma : I'm 16! And it's an ace of a good idea!
Rich Girl : Get on with it, I am missing a manicure.
Emma : Okay... since we're spice girls, we could all have, like... nicknames!
Tomboy : That's rather brill.
Emma : Oi, it is!
Gerri : Do I get to flash my tatas?
(long pause)
Black Weird Scary Girl : If you want to, Gerri...
Tomboy : Well, let's have a butcher's at it... if we all had names, we could be like seperate Spice Girls.
Rich Girl : What?
Tomboy : Nevermind. What would our names me?
Emma : Well, we'd have to think of them.
Black Weird Scary Girl : Well, the rich bitch next to me is a little daft, how is she gonna think of her name.
Emma : It's fine, this should be a doddle. We just have to think about our different personalities.
Gerri : I'm a whore.
Emma : I'm the youngest one here.
Tomboy : You can be... baby spice, darling.
Rich Girl : That is so smashing!
Black Weird Scary Girl : Shut up, you little rich bitch.
Rich Girl : I'm not rich, I'm posh!
Gerri : You can be posh spice.
Tomboy : Cor Blimey, that's brilliant!
Black Weird Scary Girl : What am I?
Emma :You're Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson's love child!
(long pause)
Gerri : How about scary spice?
Tomboy : Yeah.
Emma : That works.
Rich Girl : That's cool.
Black Weird Scary Girl : But-
Tomboy : What about me?
Rich Girl : Who cares, you trashy little lesbo. Get some make up on, my God.
Emma : Now, that's not nice, Posh Spice.
Tomboy : Well, I'd fancy a name that is the real me, not like Lesbo Spice or something.
Black Weird Scary Girl : Yeah, well I'll tell you what I want-
Gerri : Oh, can it. You are scary, therefore you are Scary Spice.
Rich Girl : What about the lesbo.
Emma : Well... she likes sports...
Tomboy : Sporty Spice?
Gerri : Yes, that should work.
Rich Girl : Sport Spice... now that translates into lesbo spice.
Black Weird Scary Girl : Who is left?
Emma : Well, we have Baby Spice, Scary Spice...
Black Weird Scary Girl : But-
Emma : Posh Spice, Sport Spice...
Gerri : Me, I don't have a nickname.
Tomboy : Well, what are some of your characteristics.
Gerri : Well... I'm a whore. I have large tatas...
Rich Girl : Is Slutty Spice G-Rated?
Other 4 : No.
Rich Girl : What about... Well-Endowed Spice?
Other 4 : Nah.
Emma : Okay, this isn't going well...
Black Weird Scary Girl : I think her red hair is funny, I do.
Tomboy : Well, honky dory, how can we use that?
Rich Girl : Ginger Spice?
(silence, them thinking)
Gerri : I like it. How did you think of that?
Rich Girl : I made something up so I get out of this hellhouse.
Emma : Nice. So we are the Spice Girls. Girl power?
Black Weird Scary Girl : How about not, get your multiplication tables right first.
It's weird, I know, but I find it humorous. But you all probably won't.
