Untitled...

[Tia]

Bittersweet tears run down her cheeks
She’s been stuck in this place too long
She can’t tell days from weeks
Everything here is wrong

Bloody lines cross her flesh
She’s been cut so deep
Her thoughts all blur and mesh
And she can’t sleep

Angry words pass through her lips
Her heart beats faster and faster
And the monitor blips
But the people walk past her

Shallows breaths are formed deep inside
Gasping and choking
With nowhere to hide
Her heart is soaking

Blood, sweat and tears
So shallow yet so deeply
Ingrained are her fears
She whispers meekly

The final moments come rushing forward
Her body bent and torn
Her mind races backward
And she wonders if they will mourn

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Feedback?

[Pirouette]

Yikes girl! Did you write that? I'm a little afraid of you! (In a good way!)
That's really good. So good it's  a little creepy.

[drumpad]

it was prettyyy good!

[clamicas]

^^ yup
It's good   but it's sort of....
It's something to rip our hearts off while we read it...... 8O if ya know what I mean :wink:

[Tia]

Yikes girl! Did you write that? I'm a little afraid of you! (In a good way!)
That's really good. So good it's  a little creepy.

LOL!

That the reaction I get from my parents. They look at me like I'm on junk or something...

Thanks though!

it was prettyyy good!

Thank you

^^ yup
It's good   but it's sort of....
It's something to rip our hearts off while we read it...... 8O if ya know what I mean :wink:

I know what you mean :wink:
But I can just never write about happy stuff, lol

[vt]

Oooh, I'm loving the rhyming! lol.

too cool  

[vanessafan18]

Oooh I can't believe I didn't see this!!  :cry: Tia it was beeeeautiful, amazing and really powerful too! Well done! xoxo

[Tia]

Thank you Georgie *hugs* <3

[vanessafan18]

Thank you Georgie *hugs* <3

You're welcome sweety! *huggles* xoxo