Author Topic: Sun and Moon  (Read 1958 times)

Morgan

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Sun and Moon
« on: December 23, 2007, 02:01:25 pm »
Okay, the other one (Watch Her) got a lot of good comments, so here's the first song I ever wrote that I was proud of.

Sun and Moon
Verse 1:
Serenity in the sky
And they cannot lie
About the thoughts they once shared
The sun sets on the day
One glance as they drift away
Serenity passing by
Rolling out of the sky
Chorus:
Sun and moon
Smile down on them
Just because they're not like the others
Since they know
This is already over
Just because they were too scared to try
Like the sun rises
She thinks of you
Like the moon glows
She will always remember
Verse 2:
Hidden in bonds
That they do not share
Around the corner she knew was there
The moon rises in the sky
Bringing back regrets of goodbye
Serenity passing through
For nothing you can do
Chorus Repeat
Bridge
And she cannot speak of you
The regret was too much
And she always thinks of you
But it was all such...a lie.
Chorus Repeat

So, hopefully you'll truthfully tell me what you think, (but not in mean ways) and if it lacks something, you will give me some constructive critism? Being as I love to write songs, getting some feedback from people would be a great way to improve.
That's what she said.

itsthefiveofus

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Sun and Moon
« Reply #1 on: December 23, 2007, 03:53:11 pm »
me likes.

I like verse 2 the most ;)

Current takes me out, what will be, will be. Floating on the sea, stars are watching me.

Morgan

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Sun and Moon
« Reply #2 on: December 24, 2007, 01:27:52 pm »
Thanks! Most of these songs I wrote from April-May this year.
That's what she said.

musician

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Sun and Moon
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2008, 11:09:08 pm »
Hey nice work! I like it. I'm not sure what story behinds it...
If only I could hear how u sing it  :)
The dreamers got punished most by truth

Morgan

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Sun and Moon
« Reply #4 on: January 29, 2008, 07:38:40 pm »
Quote from: "musician"
Hey nice work! I like it. I'm not sure what story behinds it...
If only I could hear how u sing it  :)

Lol, I have like, no time thanks to school, hopefully by summer I'll have like, the tunes to all my songs. I'll probably change the piano arrangement for it though, because I wrote the piano arrangement a long time ago before I knew much about anything.
That's what she said.