I guess I will never understand why.

[LimeTwister]

well see, you have friends...you feel accepted at least somewhere...

i have odd friends...and none of them are normal and like none fit main stream....

[LimeTwister]

but you've understood one thing that will take many people many years, if they ever, to figure out....

[LimeTwister]

Yeah Gina...It's stupid because that is most people's greatest thing--If they call someone gay...They think they've won....so stupid...

 :cry:  makes me so sad when i hear things like that, seeings as one of my best friends in the whole world is gay, goodness i can't stand when people have sucha big problem with it, and i you do, atleast have the decency to not speak of it.

Yeah, how can they think they have the right to control them...

it's a fear of the unknown.  It might change, but it will take like 100 years.  It's hard when your friends, cousins, any one you like to talk to is gay, and everyone around you can't respect that.  Gina it must be esp. hard for you to hear it too.

[loginname101]

It seems that *MY* parents think this way:

Preps are people who do drugs. I shouldn't like them.

Skaters are people who do drugs. I shouldn't like them.

Teachers are people who do drugs. Only like the old foh-gies who are most likely stuck in the "drugs are bad" era.

....

LOL!

Not that I've never had many friends, I think I've had plenty of friends. But for example, the other day on the bus downtown another guy who goes to LifeSkills with me gets on and we start talking. Somehow it came up and he asked me if I missed my friends from my other school I just transferred from. I said not really. He goes oh, you didn't have friends? and he looks at me funny. I looked at him back and said Yes I DID have friends, but I never did anything with them. He goes yeah you didn't have any friends. I didn't bother arguing with the guy, but I just told him my parents are strict, and I never did much with anyone FROM school OUTSIDE of school. He goes OOoooh.

I agree, it is petty when your world "blows up" because you didn't have the "right" friends.

Honestly, my only friends are family and my boyfriend/soon to be husband. No one is close to me more then them. Does it bother me? A little because we've all got our own lives... But I don't let it bug me enough to where I go searching for more available friends. I guess I'm just happy with what I got.

Well thats good that you are happy with what ya got. Thats all that matters:).If you are happy then everyone else is happy for ya

[Blake]

hmm I heard someone talking on the radio, and they said something that made me think of it this way...

"If your not like them, then your 'weird'."

[rosieposy87]

everyone wants to be wanted by someone...accepted by people.  If you say it doesn't matter, or think it doesn't matter, deep down it does.

Well honestly to me it doesn't.  

I hate to say it, but i don't believe that. The reason why you say it doesn't matter is because you do have friends, and you are liked in some respect. If you had none of those things, you would want to be wanted. Do you see that? It is only because you have these things that you feel like you don't need them. As our Nessa and CC said: " You don't know what you've got till its gone."

[Blake]

Interesting...

[kaysha]

I agree, this is a very interesting subject.  (Might need to split it off into a thread of it's own... it is thread worthy!?)

I enjoy being alone most of the time and am very selective with who I consider "friends" and who i consider an "aquaintenance."  Then the individuals I speak with online are in a whole different category.  I really don't care what people think about me, if they think i'm weird, or odd, or a freak... if they have those pre-conceived ideas or thoughts towards me, then they wouldn't be a very good friend for *me* to have and i don't care to associate with them.  I do, however, care about those I consider my friends and what their opinions or thoughts are about me.

So along the lines of what the above people have said, sure I do wish to be accepted by people i respect and wish to befriend... however as for the common public?  I really don't care.  On average, I'm not a very emotional person, so that could be what provoked part of my thoughts on this subject.

hrm

-katia

[Blake]

Very well put.

[LimeTwister]

i think being a "loner" and wanting to be accepted by people are two different things myself...

like when i am alone, i love it, i don't need the world, i just need me and space.  Although I have to say, I would also like to be accepted by people, even sometimes for the wrong reasons.

I don't have many friends, but i do have a lot of people i hang out with.  Some people online i do tend to consider friends, some I am closer to then people i know personally...Different people have different needs and wants.

When it comes down to it, I think everyone cares what people say about them...You may say you don't but there will usually be a little piece in you saying "what's wrong with me?" ya know?

[kaysha]

When it comes down to it, I think everyone cares what people say about them...You may say you don't but there will usually be a little piece in you saying "what's wrong with me?" ya know?

I disagree.  People i don't respect, or care about, or like at all... i don't care what they say about me.  It doesn't affect me emotionally or personally in anyway.  That might be due to my lack of emotions, i think you may be correct for other people, i just know for me... I have no feelings when it comes to that

[KilgoreTrout]

sure I do wish to be accepted by people i respect and wish to befriend... however as for the common public?  I really don't care.

I agree, the desire to be accepted by people in a general sense goes away once you're out of high school - once you have the freedom to do your own thing, the only person you need to impress is yourself...and it's much easier to make yourself happy than everyone else...

the problem is, in high school you're forced to spend a large amount of time with people you would probably not associate with if you didn't have to...

[kaysha]

sure I do wish to be accepted by people i respect and wish to befriend... however as for the common public?  I really don't care.

I agree, the desire to be accepted by people in a general sense goes away once you're out of high school - once you have the freedom to do your own thing, the only person you need to impress is yourself...and it's much easier to make yourself happy than everyone else...

the problem is, in high school you're forced to spend a large amount of time with people you would probably not associate with if you didn't have to...

I agree, i had something very interesting happen to me last night..

My house mate has a good friend still in highschool... they're going through that whole, homecoming thing... a tradition I am not to familiar with.  I guess people setup floats, drive them around, watch a football game... lots of fun i suppose.  It's weird to think i'm only 4 or 5 years older than these individuals, however the perception on life has changed so much in those years for me.

So i'm sitting with my housemate, and his friend, and they want to go get some food, but don't want to lose the seats.  Supposedly the people behind us and around us are all the really "popular" kids in school.  I say, go ahead and go... i'll wait here and save the seats.  After i said this, i got this shocked look like "you're committing popularity suicide to be seen here, alone!"  To which i promptly responded... "I have no concern, on any level, what these people think about me... if they judge me because I am saving seats for my friends, then they have a lot to learn about life."

I think that goes along with what you were mentioning Kilgore... there is so much pressure in HS, and I think I probably thought the same things they did during the 2 years i actually went to HS... however now, *shrug*, there are far more important things in life that i now spend time worrying about.  Like being there for my friends, being a stable person in their life if they need me, waiting all night at the hospital while one is having a baby so I can be there when they come downstairs scared, nervous and excited at the same time.  Those are the things that really matter to me.

-katia

[Holly]

people who put other people down just have a problem with them selves... theyre so insecure that they have to lower themselves to that level, its a sad thing.

[Lucy-san]

hmm this is interesting...

I personally am very aware that I am very affected by what people think of me. I'm neurotic in the sense that I always think people are talking about me behind my back and finding flaws about me. I think its just my sensitive personality...but I guess it could be to do with the fact that I'm in high school too...considering I'm smack dab in the middle of it right now. But, most of my best friends, the ones that I really connect with, are in university. They're the ones who I'd be truly and extremely upset about if I found out they had found flaws in how I direct my life.

Despite how upset I get about peoples opinions of me I dont let these change how i conduct myself, as much as is conciously possible at least. I dont know if this is the best thing to do, because it is pretty stessful at times...but I'd probably be just as paranoid and therefore upset about peoples opinions even if I did force myself to behave in a way that was completely normal.